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If you really wanted to build Crit on Neith go an actual Crit-build, not some odd hybrid that lacks lifesteal and can get easily shut-down. (But at that point you may as well play an AA-based hunter).
E.g. Transcendence, Warrior Tabi, Soul Eater, The Crusher, The Executioner, Jotunn's Wrath
Or, Transcendence, Warrior Tabi, The Crusher, Brawler's Beat Stick, Titan's Bane, Odysseus' Bow.
(I didn't know you were gone.)
Your skill leveling order isn't correct. You can't get your first skill to level 5 until you hit level 9. If you're looking to point skip (don't level a skill at 8, then level 2 skills at 9), then it just doesn't make sense with Neith, especially when you're not prioritizing your ult. Only time you'd point skip is when you have to also deal with the limitation of the 2nd point of the ult at 9. So, you'll need to fix it to level Unravel at 8, then max Spirit Arrow at 9.
Also, you can't put your 4th skill point into your ult until level 17...you have it at 16.
As for your builds, is there a specific reason you get / prefer crit items? Her typical, optimal build path is via power and pen, with the possibility of getting some CDR (besides Transcendence).
Not my preference, personally, but I can see how it can work.