How to play pele :: Cooldillan's Blog

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Step 1. Don’t
Step 2. Get soul eater
Step 3. Slam your face into your keyboard or slap your ******* onto your controller
Step 4. Be teleported to another dimension where all pele players go
Step 5. Realize that just because you do good on an op god doesn’t mean your good
Step 6. Realize that every time you play pele another brain cell is lost
Step 7. Pick a god that takes skill
Step 8. Wait for that god to get a tier 5 skin and get made easier
Step 9. Now have no gods to play because every other god is easy
Step 10. Go onto smite fire and complain

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me like this idea me do this

(71) |

Don't forget to complain about Titan Forge (Hi-Rez) and every skin they lauch.

(143) |

Step 11. Find out how to make that god work in 5 different roles.

(81) |

Step 12. Quit whining about how "OP" a god is.

(3) |

But if we keep whining about how op, maybe the god will get nerfed

Load more comments (4 more replies) →

(81) |

You're assuming Hi-Rez knows or cares about this site. You'd be better off complaining on the official forums versus here. As for your blog, while Pele is strong, she can easily be shutdown.

(143) |

Don't worry, Hi Rez listens to the whiners on Reddit.

(Though to be fair Mercury does need a nerf badly).

(81) |

I think his one shouldn't be able to process golden blade; that or GB shouldn't be able to process basic attack effects like Mercury's one.

(3) |

I was joking about the complain thing. All of my blogs have been jokes.

(7) |

Step 13. Fix your guide.

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(81) |

Step 14. Write a guide so Gary can complain about it not being fixed yet.

(17) |

Step 15. Play with bots to make you feel better about yourself while simultaneously attempting to update all of your outdated guides.

(46) |

Step 16. Stop playing Smite entirely for two seasons.

(17) |

Step 17. Wait until Smite is para-gone before playing your first match.

(7) |

Referencing CoolDillan's Guide: https://www.smitefire.com/smite/guide/you-cant-run-from-the-storm-susano-jungle-16351

(3) |

U c my guide is fine if u look at it

(7) |

1) frostbound hammer
2) pestilence
3) overcap of cdr on ult bot build

Not fine mate. Needs improving. But i have noticed you updating the guide over time. Keep it up. It looks better than the first iteration.

(3) |

1) don’t overcap cdr in any of my builds
2) pestilence is a must in some scenarios
3) frostbound is an item that exists so it stays

(7) |

1) it is not a good idea to remove hydra's lament in your ult bot build. Here is a better build
Warrior tabi
Jotunn's wrath
Hydra's Lament
Brawler's beat stick
Mantle of discord or stone cutting sword
Mantle of discord or stone cutting sword

Stone cutting sword may not be the best item for him, but since you like auto attacking with susano so much, i am including the item
In the build. It also has that precious movement speed that you like.

2) pestilence is NOT a must on susano jungle. Let your solo or supp build it. You should be building brawler's beat stick.

3) this is exactly why your guide is not optimized. There is a reason your guide has bad ratings.

Also, please lose the attitude. BranMuffin17 is trying to help you fix your builds. There is no reason for you to tell him, "You do know abilities have cooldowns right..." Branmuffin17 is FAR above your level in terms of game knowledge and theory crafting. Consider taking his advice seriously.

I will conclude with this: This guide is yoir guide. Do whatever you want with it. If you take our advice great. If not, then I hope you will understand better why your guide is downvoted.

FYI, I did not down vote your guide. You seem like someone who generally responds to feedback, so I want to give you a chance.

(3) |

I mean if all of your egos are too high to take a joke than I’m sorry because they shouldn’t be. Never did I say pestilence is a must on susano, I said in some scenarios. Also where are you getting diamond I’m masters on pc and gym on console for all game modes (except joust on console I don’t like joust too much)

(7) |

wrote:

Also where are you getting diamond

I meant Kriega is a diamond level ranked player (which is why you should seriously consider his advice).

(143) |

Post proof then. And even if you are masters on PC, AzureBlaze is masters on PC and he has some really bad builds.

(3) |

Far above in theory crafting yes but game knowledge I’m sorry to tell you but not even close

(7) |

wrote:

but game knowledge I’m sorry to tell you but not even close

Then take kriega1's advice seriously. It seems he, branmuffin17, and most others (myself included) are in agreement about your builds being unoptimal. He is better at theory crafting AND game knowledge than you (diamond ranked conquest player).

I am not trying to put you down. I am just suggesting you listen to the advice of these gentlemen.

(394) |

Lol. This sounds like a challenge. Try me.

(4) |

https://media1.tenor.com/images/7260ad7de2d77fa3b597026aee82b391/tenor.gif?itemid=9265562

(143) |

MJ looks kinda scary in that pic.

(81) |

That was from his "Thriller" video where he turned into a zombie, so yeah, he's scary in that clip.

(394) |

That was before all of his crazy plastic surgery work. That's not scary. Look to 15-20 years later.

(143) |

I know what you mean but it was the facial expression/makeup/ his eyes bulging out.

(81) |

Pretty much, especially since his nose looked like it could fall off at any moment.

(7) |

I am so sorry for starting this... I had no idea it would turn out like this.

(3) |

You guys post unironically on smitefire you’re trash just stop (Joke by the way!!!)

(143) |

Feel free to leave and join the SoloDoubleJackass bandwagon, creating an alt account to troll Smitefire.

(3) |

I mean if u cant tell now than theres a problem

(46) |

Maybe everyone should just stop, and some people should have a look in the mirror, too.

Dillan, the sarcasm is dripping off, congratulations, but clearly nobody is amused by the... "jokes". Jokes have a time and place, but this isn't it.

Kriega, "SoloDoubleJackass"? Really? It's funny, because by saying things like that, you're not so much different. Similar to how you sometimes break people down with your comments, calling their builds "troll" or "trash" without basis.

Here's something for you:

I don't care how knowledgeable you are in this game. For all I ****ing know you're all the greatest SMITE players in history. If you're going to be an *** about it, that still means you're being an *** about it.

I know, a bit of hipocrisy in here, I admit, but you all just don't seem to grasp the idea that you being an ***hat about something is not going to help improve this site's reputation either.

You want to voice your opinion? By all means, but do so in decent manner, rather than just calling a guide / build "trash" or "troll", or dripping your unnecessary sarcasm all over it.

-1

(3) |

Looking back on this, this was the time for jokes this entire ****ing website is a joke

(7) |

wrote:

Looking back on this, this was the time for jokes this entire ****ing website is a joke

Dillan, I am very disapointed in you. You were a welcomed member of the very community that you are scrutinizing. Your Susano guide definitely showed promise and you were pretty open to feedback and discussion.

However, if these are your true colors, then I think everyone in the smitefire community would be better off without your contributions.

I also read your most recent comment in response to GulfWulf, which you deleted. You should be ashamed of yourself, and I hope you can find something more productive to do with your time than trolling internet forums.

(3) |

Don’t act all nice now you know damn well you were being an *** you’re a hypocrite people like you disgust me.

(394) |

Dillan, last warning on this. Please stop the negative comments. I'm working with everyone to try to get everyone to chill the F out.

(7) |

That was not my intention. If I have offended you, I sincerely apologize.
BranMuffin was very clear when he said "These all need to stop." If you have nothing else but insults to say, then I have said everything I needed to say.

(394) |

I deleted. These all need to stop. Now please.

Comment has been deleted

(81) |

And now that you've shown your *** to everybody, I bid you good day because I'm not going to waste any more time or thought on someone who isn't intelligent enough to engage in a conversation without insults.

(3) |

Dang i thought it was funny

(143) |

If it’s a trash or troll build I say it for a reason not for the sake of it. And yes, SoloDoubleJackass. I got banned from his twitch chat for asking why he encourages people to make troll builds on Smitefire.

(7) |

Hi zero. Regarding kriega: No disrespect intended when i say this. Also, i am not taking sides.

To be fair, kriega has never personally attacked anyone. He never called anyone stupid, etc. He called someone's build stupid, but he was attacking the build not the person.

Also, i kind of understand where kriega is coming from. Out of everyone here, branmuffin excluded, kriega offers the most feedback on guides. I think looking at one misleading build after anothet has taken its toll on him and worn his patience thin. I sort of feel this way too. Gulfwolf can vouch for me on this one when i suggested for him to stop with the deathbringer jokes.

I am not defending the man, as i am sure he is more than capable of defending himself. I just wanted to see the story from his point of view.

Again zero, no disrespect meant towards you.

(81) |

"Calmer than you are." - Walter, The Big Lebowski.

As for "SoloDoubleJackass", that's my fault. I call him that because of the joke videos he made about some of the site's rather terrible builds. I have no respect for the kid but I will stop it with the insults.

(143) |

I like the name you came up with for him, fits quite nicely, just like cheddar and pineapple.

(81) |

What can I say? I have no respect for anybody who intentionally trashes tbe site, especially if they encourage others to as well.

(7) |

Hey Zero. I will be sure to tone down my replies in the future. But let us all just stop commenting on this post.

I caused all this by defending branmuffin And telling dillan to drop the attitude. So i will take responsibility by saying this. If there are no further comments regarding dillan's susano guide, let us stop commenting before this gets out of hand.
If there are further, constructive comments, let us post them on his susano guide.

(143) |

If you think this is getting out of hand, you should have seen the original argument on my Chronos guide - speaking of which, Bran, are the deleted comments ever saved somewhere? Because I would love to read over it again.

(46) |

"Read this slowly so your small brain can comprehend it: I DO NOT have an xbox, I am on PS4 *inserts link to PSN account here*"

(143) |

Surely the comments are saved though, right? I've seen deleted comments appear partially in the recent comments thing on a profile.

Also I find it funny how that idiot said Chronos is awful yet he got nerfed later in season 4 once pros started picking him up.

(46) |

Sorry to disappoint, Kriega.
However, to anyone interested in the comment graveyard that is kriega's chronos guide, here's the prequel:
https://www.reddit.com/r/Smite/comments/6g3pbl/comment/djb43jt

Here's the sequel:
https://www.reddit.com/r/Smite/comments/8uk6kp/getting_back_into_it_and_need_midlane/

(143) |

Please tell me you have all the comments saved.

(7) |

Nah mate. I do not think this is out of hand. I just do not want xzerostrike, who seems like a good man, to be offended. I do not want dillan to think i am insulting him (although i am insulting his guide).

(394) |

I'm almost never serious. People need to be able to smile. We all cool now?

(7) |

Ice cold my man

(3) |

Yall went all out on this post jeeeeeeez lmao

(17) |

I was gone for a day and I missed all this?

Smh

(3) |

Hehe

(3) |

I removed hydras? Hang on

(81) |

First I can't joke about , now I can't joke about Gary. When will the madness end!

Comment has been deleted

(81) |

Keep it up and I'll bring those jokes back.

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