MEGA DUNK BACCHUS WOOOO

This is my magical bruiser solo Bacchus build.
I doubt this will be competitive in any way, and it hasn't been tested, but still so fun on paper.
I will get VERY hyped will typing this so excuse any offensive remarks made during this post please!
Alright, on to my current strat!
*spams 1 at fountain*

STERT

VAMPIRIC SHROUD - GOTTA GET DAT VAMPIR FAT GUY SPREDDIN THE DIABETS AMIRITE? THE LIFSTEAL TOO GOOD, BACCHUS THE PARTYING LEACH OP

LOST ARTIFACT - XTRA DMG DMG DMG UNNGH THE DUNK TOO GOOD

POTS - SMOKIN DAT HELT WEED TOO GOOD, AND MANA JOINTS R SOOOO PSYCHADELIC


UDDER IEETEMS

CHRONOS PENDANT - THE DMG AND THE CDR UNGH MAKES THE DUNK COMBO SO MUCH BETTERRRRRRR

SHOES OF FOCUS - FULL CDR MAKES DUNKING EVEN EASIER, SPAM THE **** OUT THAT ULTI BRAH

ROD OF TAHUTI - MORE LIKE ROD OF THE BOOTY! DIS SHEET MAKES YO DAMAGE SKYROCKET SO MUCH YOU GONNA GET YO ROD ALL UP IN TA BOOTY NA'M SAYIN?

VOID STONE - YO, DIS **** MAKES YO DAMAGE GOOD WHILE PROTECTIN YO ***! GET DAT PENETRATION YO!
or/and
HIDE OF THE URCHIN - Y'All WANT TO GET DIS **** ERLY CUZ THU STACKS NA'MSAYIN? DIS DONT GIVE THAT PENETRATION BUT DAMN YO *** GONNA HAVE AS MUCH SURVIVABILITY AS NEZHA's BALLSACK WHILE HE'S ON STEROIDS WITOUT NO PROTECTION NA'MSAYIN?

OBSIDIAN SHARD - MO LIKE OBSIDIAN SHART, CUZ DOS **** RIP THRU PEOPLES ***ES! THIS PLUS VOID STONE MAKES YOU BE LIKE A CHICK MAGNET, CUZ DAYUM DAT DOUBLE PENETRATION

POLYNOMICON - NUTTIN BETTER THEN GETTIN A POWERHOUSE TURKEY SLAP AFTER DUNKIN SOME MOFO! GET DIS **** FO SUM MEGA *** BASICS YO!

BANCROFT'S TALON - DIS **** MAKE YO *** GOT MO SURVIVABILITY THEN THANATOS WITH A FULLY STACKED BLOODFORGE! DAT LIFSTL MAKES MUTHA****IN DRACULA JEALOUS!

SKIZZIZZLE ORDA
1 - 1, 8, 11, 14, 16
2 - 2, 3, 6, 7, 9
3 - 4, 12, 15, 18, 19
4 - 5, 10, 13, 17, 20
YO ULTI IS ****IN RAD AND A FIGHT CHANGER FO SHO, MAX IT FIRST EXCEPT A LVL 9 MUTHA****AAAAAA
THEN YO 2, BECAUSE THE DUNK SQUAD IS COUNTING ON YOU MUTHA****A
AFTERWARDS PUT MORE POINTS IN YO PURPLE DRANK BUT ALTERNATE WITH THAT AND YO CRAZY *** BURP CUZ YO CRAZY *** BURP DO DAMAGE, YO PURPLE DRANK DONT

So yeah, my silly little solo lane casual theory. This is just a theory right now, no actual tests have been done, but I might turn this into a guide once I get more practice in with the god of purple drank.
LET THE ACTUALLY PROFESSIONAL REPLIES ABOUT THE SOLO LANE FULL DAMAGE BACCHUS THEORY AND NOT MY DUMB WRITING STYLE!
Just kidding